Fic: Sweet Mystery of Life by goddess47 / Pic: Johnny in a Bottle by mad_lyn

[goddess47]

Title: Sweet Mystery of Life
Author: goddess47
Rating: NC-17
Warnings/Spoilers: Abuse of italics and oxford commas. Oblique reference to the Disney movie "Aladdin." Post series, ignores lots of SGA canon.
Pairing: McKay/Sheppard
Words: 14,181
Summary: "How many more times can we say f*cking Ancients?"

Notes: For the 2012 sgareversebang. Huge thanks to the patient and understanding mods for the late, late, late writer.

Based on the picture from the lovely mad_lyn who has been ever patient with my wibbling and lateness. Hope I did your picture justice! Your John didn't look too thrilled, I used that as my muse. And not sure how your G-rated pic inspired an oh-so NC-17 fic!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~


Title: Johnny in a Bottle on Livejournal or on Dreamwidth
Artist: mad_lynn
Rating: G
Pairing: John/Rodney

Preview:

Full pic on LJ

Full pic on DW

(Um... sorry, she has them f'locked until the reveal and I'm a step ahead of her! They're coming!)

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"Come on, McKay," John fumed. "GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF HERE!"

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

It had started out as a relatively normal day.

To be honest, it had started out as a spectacular day.

Two days ago, Ronon and Amelia Banks had taken some personal time together. Amelia evidently had been hesitant to ask but had approached John for some leave time.

"Not a problem," he assured her. "If you and Ronon are going to the mainland?" She had blushed a bit and nodded, "Then it's officially a diplomatic mission with the locals and you don't have to use any of your leave for this."

"Thank you, sir!" Amelia replied with a small grin.

"Everyone needs some down time," he had assured her. "And if you can get Ronon to relax at all, you're doing more than most of the rest of us have been able to manage."

"I don't think the word relax is in Ronon's vocabulary!" she had laughed.

"Go, have fun," John had dismissed her.

With Ronon off the city for a long weekend, and Teyla, Torren and Kanaan also staying with the Athosians on the mainland, Rodney had persuaded John that maybe, for once, he could actually sleep in and not go off running at the crack of dawn.

"But I'm awake early! You know that!" John had protested. "I haven't slept in in so long that I'm not sure I know how anymore." He glared at Rodney. "And you aren't exactly the poster boy for slacking off and sleeping late either."

That had brought a gleam to Rodney's eye. "Don't worry," Rodney had leaned in close. "I have plans..." he breathed in John's ear.

John shivered slightly. Rodney's plans generally turned out to be exceptional and they didn't get to indulge themselves too often. No one had been surprised when they had simply moved in together after Atlantis was returned to Pegasus after they had saved Earth from the Wraith. Richard Woolsey had matter-of-factly approved the change of quarters for both of them without comment although John had overheard a couple of Marines muttering something that sounded suspiciously like "about time" when John had scouted for help in moving Rodney's belongings. John's few belongings fit into a couple of boxes and he moved them himself.

He and Rodney had moved into a three bedroom apartment in a newly opened residential tower. They didn't need the space but there were units to spare in the tower and this particular apartment had both a balcony off the bedroom as well as a spectacular ocean view from the living area. The extra bedrooms let Rodney have an office – and somewhere to put all his accumulated electronics – and the third bedroom was an eclectic collection of storage boxes and book cases with Pegasus souvenirs they didn't quite know what to do with.

Meals were still in a central location for efficiency but with the opening of the residential tower, and the recent influx of both military and science staff, there were now two dining options to choose from. The original mess became primarily a 'working' mess, serving three main meals a day and open around the clock for snacks, cold sandwiches and hot coffee. The new eating place – more of a dining hall – wasn't quite a restaurant, the options were limited, but food was cooked to order and only served meals within specific hours of the day.

"Colonel Sheppard! Dr. McKay!" Dr. Norah Bending was a civilian dietician with experience in both military field operations and larger bases who had been recruited to run the food services on Atlantis. The new dining hall had been her idea and she had become a popular figure in the city. "I have your table for you, if you'd come this way."

"We don't need..." John started to protest but stopped at Rodney's hand at the small of his back, guiding him to follow Norah. Ah! Part of Rodney's plan he realized.

"Your dinner will start shortly," Norah informed them as she indicated one of the alcove tables set at the rear of the room.

John couldn't help but blush slightly as Norah gave him a knowing wink as he slid into the booth. This was "Lovers Row" where couples came for private, intimate dinners when celebrating birthdays, anniversaries or other events. While he and Rodney had been together for... oh, wait... two years. An anniversary! Damn, he had forgotten! A glance at Rodney's smug grin told him he was busted.

"Thank you. For remembering," John leaned in for a small kiss. Something they never did in public but, well, anyone who didn't know about their relationship before this, knew now. And news that Rodney had planned an anniversary dinner together would be all over Atlantis by morning.

Rodney had dug into his personal stash for a good bottle of wine to go with the dinner. Growing up in Patrick Sheppard's house had taught John enough about wine that he could appreciate really good wine when it was presented to him.

Dinner wasn't terribly different than usual although a tad more leisurely. They talked about their day, Rodney complained about some of the newer recruits and John told Rodney about how one of the newer Gate teams had come back covered in pink slime... and that while the slime had washed off, the pink didn't and Carson had determined that it would have to wear off – and it would. In a couple of weeks.

After dinner, they ambled through some of the main areas of the city. John appreciated that Rodney let him check on various areas before calling it a night. They didn't stop anywhere, just a spot check to see that nothing important was happening and that John's city was in good hands.

Once back in their room, Rodney offered, "Nightcap?"

John hesitated, "Nah, thanks... save it for some other night. Besides, if you have plans, I want to be sober to appreciate them."

Rodney grinned. "Well, then let's go and get naked," he leered.

John felt himself get hard with that, taking a deep breath to keep himself under some semblance of control. He went to their bedroom and stopped in the doorway – taking a couple more deep breaths.

Rodney was at his back. "You like?" he breathed in John's ear.

"Oh, yeah," John moaned as Rodney took a nip at the side of his neck.

Rodney had managed to lay out most of John's favorite sex toys. The oversize dildo that was an exact duplicate of Rodney's cock... only slightly larger. A paddle that stung just enough to give him an edge of pain without causing long term bruising. Restraints so that he could move only as much as Rodney would let him. A cock ring that John knew he'd need to last more than five minutes.

John turned in place and brought Rodney in for a deep kiss. He didn't resist as Rodney moved them toward the bed. Breaking the kiss, Rodney commanded, "Let's get to the naked part."

Moving apart, John stripped off his clothes as quickly as possible. He remembered their first time... they had been in so much of a hurry that when they came John still had one boot on, with his pants tangled about his ankles. Rodney never had gotten his t-shirt off and it was rucked up under his arms. But it had been glorious... Rodney's pale skin and eager hands had been as perfect as John had hoped they would be. Rodney had been dazed and mussed, a look John thought looked particularly good on him and had vowed to make Rodney look like that as often as possible.

"On your back," Rodney told him.

John crawled to the middle of the bed, watching Rodney leisurely take off his own clothes. Rodney didn't quite make a show of it for him, but took his time. John enjoyed watching the growing display of Rodney's pale skin as he took off his shirt and shimmied out of the khaki pants he had worn to dinner. The last was Rodney's silk boxers, something John tried not to think about too often during the day since it was so distracting. Rodney had picked up a case of them while Atlantis had been on Earth.

"Spoiled for choices," Rodney mused aloud. "Any preferences?"

"Gonna need that cock ring," John admitted.

"I can do that," Rodney reached for the ring and wound it around John's balls. It wasn't so severe as to stop John from coming, but it would help him maintain some level of control.

Rodney lay next to John and brought him in for a kiss. John wrapped his arms around Rodney, touching where he could. He had quickly figured out Rodney was a touch-starved as he was. Neither had let anyone to get too close to them, and John was humbled to realize how open Rodney was about being touched by him.

"On your back," Rodney directed. He reached for the lube and leisurely prepped John for the dildo. John loved the full feeling it gave him, although the hard plastic didn't have the same effect as Rodney's own cock.

Sliding the dildo into John, John gave a low moan as Rodney tagged his prostate in the process.

"Don't want to come, yet," John protested.

"Don't worry, just wanted to make sure you're still interested," Rodney assured him. He twisted the dildo slightly and snugged it in place.

John moaned again and looked down at his own leaking cock, "Oh, I'm still interested."

Rodney grinned. "We have all night," he reminded John.

"Not going anywhere," John promised.

Rodney left the dildo in John's ass as he lay back down next to John, kissing him and tweaking his nipples slightly.

Rodney reached for the lube again, John assumed to prep his own dick to slide into John. John was surprised when Rodney spread the lube generously on John's cock.

"Gonna ride you," Rodney said, sitting up and straddling John.

While John loved being in Rodney, he was faintly self-conscious of the size of his own dick. It wasn't small or anything but it was, well, decidedly very average. Rodney, on the other hand, had a longer and meatier cock, one John adored having in him.

Rodney didn't prep himself, so he lowered himself on John's cock gradually. John held still to let Rodney move at his own pace and was double glad for the cock-ring as the tight heat surrounded his cock. Finally, Rodney was seated on John and rolled his hips slightly.

"Okay," Rodney sighed. "Love this."

John adored the feeling of the dildo in his ass, filling him completely and simultaneously being inside Rodney. He forced himself to relax, to stave off his own orgasm, to make sure this lasted as long as possible for both of them.

Rodney leaned forward, kissing John and rolling his hips again. John thrust up and Rodney moaned into the kiss.

Rodney sat up and then started riding John in earnest. John held Rodney's hips as he raised and lowered himself on John's cock, twisting slightly as he went up and down. John knew he had tagged Rodney's prostate a couple of time when Rodney moaned.

All the running for their lives in Pegasus had given Rodney thighs of steel, John knew. They were muscular and strong, and Rodney could bounce up and down on John's cock for quite a long time.

Rodney clenched on John's cock and John reached one hand for Rodney's bobbing cock. John didn't do anything fancy, just gave Rodney a firm place to thrust into.

"John!" Rodney moaned. He started working himself in earnest. John tightened his hand slightly and powered into Rodney, lifting his own hips so they slammed together.

Suddenly, Rodney was coming all over John's chest. Rodney ground down on John's lap, grinding them together for all he was worth. Rodney's orgasm made him tighten around John's cock.

The cock ring was only so much help and, with the additional pressure, John's balls tightened up. "Coming!" John panted. John felt himself pulse into Rodney, the edges of his vision turning white with the pleasure.

Rodney leaned forward suddenly, and John's dick felt cool as it slipped from Rodney's ass. Rodney's mouth on his made up for it, as they kissed, softly. Rodney reached down and eased the dildo from John's ass.

"Don't want to stick together," Rodney muttered.

"Lie back," John said. "I'll get it."

"Oh, good," Rodney said absently.

John went to the bathroom, cleaned himself up roughly and brought a warm washcloth back for Rodney. John wiped down Rodney's chest and cock, knowing they'd need a shower in the morning.

Rodney had re-arranged the sheets and John scooted under with him. Rodney wrapped himself around John and they fell asleep.

In the morning, John stirred. Rodney muttered, "Piss, then get back here."

John climbed back into the bed as Rodney padded off to the bathroom. When he came back, his eyes gleamed at John lying naked on the bed.

As Rodney twisted around, John realized that this was Rodney's morning plan. Slow, mutual blow jobs. They had nowhere to be and hopefully no one would call, so they could take their time.

Rodney's meaty cock was quite the mouthful for John and he was sorry he couldn't take it all in. Rodney had never complained but John sometimes wondered what the other man thought. John put his hand about the base of Rodney's cock, took in what he could and licked, nibbled and sucked until Rodney was pouring down his throat. Rodney renewed his attention to John's cock after that and John was coming himself.

Rodney manhandled John so they could lie together and they drifted back to sleep.

After a late breakfast, they went off to Rodney's personal lab to work on some of the devices that Rodney had put aside that he thought needed John's ATA gene to activate.

John remembered a pull... and then it was dark.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Not that shouting did any good. John had been stuck... wherever he was... for what he thought was at least a couple of hours now. It was pitch black and a relatively small space with no openings he could feel. The only good news was that he wasn't hurt and everything else seemed to be intact.

Interestingly enough, he didn't need to piss and wasn't hungry or thirsty. He knew by touch that he had a power bar in his shirt pocket – peanut butter, Rodney's favorite – but resisted eating it until he really needed to eat. Eating all his food out of boredom now and starving to death later wasn't exactly a smart idea.

He sat cross legged in the middle of the floor and took stock – again – of what he had figured out so far.

The room he was in wasn't uncomfortable. The temperature was within normal limits and the air was fresh and breathable. The floor was covered in some fabric and padded, not so much to be impossible to walk on but much more comfortable than some of the prison cells they had been put in on occasion. The walls were bare, except for one wall that seemed to be etched with something that he hadn't the patience to try to decipher as yet. With a small jump, he could brush the ceiling with his outstretched fingers. High enough of an area to walk around in and not feel too claustrophobic. Unless he didn’t get out too soon – then the small, dark space would start to close in on him.

His own voice didn't echo, the padded floor helped with that he assumed. But there were also no external sounds, no voices.

John closed his eyes, which he knew was redundant in the dark but it was habit, and did some of the deep breathing exercises they had all learned from Teyla. He never had been really good at it but it would help with the closed-in feeling.

Wish I could see something John thought idly.

He jumped when some kind of light suddenly turned on. He blinked several times as his eyes got used to the relative brightness. No light fixtures, as far as he could see, just... light.

Ancient writing surrounded him. Every square inch of wall seemed to have something written on it. The writing stopped and started in no obvious pattern and twisted and turned in all directions. The floor underneath him was a deep maroon sturdy fabric and a pink-ish color covered the walls. Well, what he could see of the walls between the lettering.

John turned in place, studying the wall as he went, looking for anything that was a pattern. Something he could interpret. His Ancient was weak at the best of times and this was more than he could deal with.

The etching on the wall that he had been able to feel with his fingertips was actually writing. A fancy script, gold letters outlined in black so it stood out against the pink wall – faintly garish if one cared about such things – that he probably would never had figured out by touch, but easily readable with the light. And strangely enough, in English.

1. No wishing for more wishes.
2. No bringing back anyone who has died.
3. No making someone fall in love.

"What the fuck?" John asked, mystified, into the silence.

He settled back down, facing the writing he could read this time. Not sure how it was going to help, it beat looking at the indecipherable wall behind him.

It couldn't be that easy. Thinking about the light coming on, John said carefully, "I wish I could see what McKay is doing."

He jumped when a... hologram?... of Rodney appeared in front of him. Around the edges of the display, John could make out the lab they had been working in. He could also see Rodney reaming someone out – he couldn't see the other person in the display, but John had watched Rodney berate enough minions to know what was happening.

Rodney pointed to the device John had been handling before he ended up here and then back at the unseen person, speaking non-stop. Too bad he couldn't hear... wait!

"I wish I could hear and see what McKay was doing," John said.

"... and I still think you’re an asshole for making something like this!" Rodney ranted.

That's my Rodney! John thought.

He watched as Rodney's hands flew on the keyboard in front of him while berating the unseen person. "Fucking Ancients. Always looking to Ascend and fucking move on. Like it's going to get you anywhere special or solve any problems." He shot a glare at the unseen person. "Problems that your people fled from instead of trying to actually solve."

"It was not our intention to..." the unseen person stuttered. A soft, hesitant voice that didn't immediately provide any clues to the person's gender. He thought about seeing if he could see more but the No wishing for more wishes was in the back of his mind. He had already made three wishes and hope he hadn't screwed himself with that.

"Fuck your intentions," Rodney interrupted. "You caused this problem and if you think you're going to go anywhere without solving it, you have another thing coming. I'll Ascend myself and haul your ass back so fast you'll get whiplash."

"But, you don't understand..." the voice said, with a touch of despair.

"I don't have to fucking understand," Rodney snarled. "I only have to fix it. And you're going to help me."

"But I don't know how!" the voice protested.

"You were in that fucking device for ten thousand years!" Rodney shot back. "You have to know something."

"Ten thousand years! No! Everyone I know... gone?" the voice quavered.

"Gone. Ascended, mostly but, yes, long gone," Rodney replied. His hands continued to fly over the keyboard.

"But... I was only a student," the voice replied. "I had the honor of working with Scholar Janus..."

Rodney's head snapped up and his hands stilled. "Stop. Right. There," he commanded. He leaned over the keyboard slightly and said in a quiet, deadly calm voice. "You mean to tell me this was one of Janus' projects?"

Silence from the other person. John assumed the person was nodding. In some fear, he hoped. That was the one voice that even John avoided. When Rodney was shouting loud and fast, everyone knew it was his way of letting off steam – or fear, John knew – and paid attention but mostly didn't take it personally. When Rodney went still and quiet, everyone held their breath. The quieter Rodney got, the more upset he was.

"How did you end up in that... thing?" Rodney asked quietly.

"Scholar Janus offered me the privilege of testing the tidsskrist," the voice said. "He said it would not hurt, and it did not. And that it would assist me in... finding information."

"Finding information?" Rodney persisted.

"My mother has...," a small hesitation, "had an illness that the physicians could not cure. But one Physician Scholar had a memory that there had been someone with an illness like hers before. But he did not remember if it was something he heard or read... our only hope was to search the..." the voice searched for a word, "Repository of all information, to see if I could find the needed information."

"It's a fucking search device for the city database?" Rodney's voice got even softer.

"Oh, no. Not just a search," the voice protested. "The search functions are built into the interface, those are simple and anyone could use those. Scholar Janus thought that the search would be more efficient and give better results if the person looking for the information was interfaced with the Repository. In that manner, the seeker of knowledge could combine the power of the tidsskrist with the intent of the user. To better refine the seeking of knowledge."

"How do I get John out of there?" Rodney asked.

"I... I do not know," the voice admitted. "Scholar Janus did not share that information with me."

"How were you supposed to get out of there?" Rodney asked.

"Scholar Janus was to release me from the tidsskrist," the voice replied.

"Why did it let you out today?" Rodney demanded.

"I am sorry, I do not know!" The voice was almost a wail.

Rodney sat back with a huff. He considered the unseen person in front of him and looked at something else... the device that John was imprisoned in, he guessed.

Keying his radio, Rodney called, "Radek, we have a... situation. Can you join me in my lab?"

"I will not do kinky sex with you and your Colonel," Radek's voice floated through the earpiece. John groaned. The one time he had tried to get Rodney to have sex in the lab, Radek had walked in on them... he had backed out quickly, muttering in Czech and shaking his head. He had not come to the lab since then without either calling ahead or upon Rodney's explicit request.

"That's not why we were here!" Rodney protested automatically. "John activated something and..." Rodney took a deep breath. "I need some help."

"I will be right there," Radek replied briskly.

John wasn't sure what Rodney had in mind but he wasn't sure it was a good idea. Not too long after they had moved in together, John had started to talk to Rodney about not doing anything stupid if something happened to him but Rodney had given him a hard look and simply said in a flat voice, "Pot. Kettle." Knowing Rodney was right didn't make it any easier.

John heard the doors to the lab open and Radek say, "Now what have you done?" A pause. "Hello. We have not met." Radek’s voice said with curiosity.

"My name is Whaim," the voice said.

"And where did you come from?" Radek asked.

"I was in the tidsskrist," Whaim replied.

"See?" Rodney put in. "I need some help."

"Where is Colonel Sheppard?" Radek asked cautiously.

"We think, in the fucking tidsskrist," Rodney replied. "One of Janus' toys."

"Ah! I understand," Radek replied. "What do you need help with?"

"I want to touch the tidsskrist," Rodney explained. "It didn't suck John into it as soon as he touched it, so I'm assuming there's a control of some sort that he accidentally activated. But if I end in there with him, or in place of him, I need someone here to figure out what to do."

"Is that a smart thing to do?" Radek asked. Only Radek could get away with that sort of question – one that questioned Rodney's intelligence. It had saved their lives more than once and John was grateful Rodney listened to him.

"I think so," Rodney reasoned. "Whaim here is approximately ten thousand years old, having been in the tidsskrist since Janus' time. She appears to be reasonably healthy, does not seem to have aged, isn’t a drooling idiot and hasn't gone mad. It's worth a shot."

"And you think Colonel Sheppard is in there," Radek said.

"Yes."

"Okay, what would you like me to do?" Radek asked.

"Come over here and see if you can find any records of this... thing... in Janus' record," Rodney directed. "I've not found any reference to a tidsskrist, but heaven only knows."

They traded places and the focus of John's sight moved toward the smallish device he remembered handling before he found himself in here. If that was really where he was.

"You better be in there," Rodney said softly as he neared the device. John held his breath as Rodney reached out a hand.

John felt an immense pull as he was whirled about and suddenly stood before Rodney.

"You called?" John drawled.

"Wait! What happened? How did you get here? Or out of there?" Rodney babbled.

"Dunno," John shrugged. "I think you touched the whatsits and got me out."

"Then what did you do differently to get stuck in the tidsskrist," Rodney demanded. He handed John the device. "Show me exactly what you did."

John looked at the device in his hands. It was about the size of a cigar box – he wondered idly if anyone would even know that reference anymore – and had no distinguishing features. As he turned it over, his fingertips slid into minute spaces. He turned it over without moving his hands.

"See this?" John held it out slightly awkwardly to Rodney. "Some type of control. Or something."

Rodney moved closer, brushing his fingers gently over John's. "Let me..." he started.

John stepped back and said firmly, "Not yet. Let's get more information before you end up stuck in there."

Whaim – who was a young woman in perhaps her early twenties, John noted – stepped forward slightly and added, "There is a... mind?"

"Mental?" Rakek suggested.

"Yes, thank you. A mental component. You have to align your thoughts so that you can interface with the tidsskrist," she told them.

John groaned. "Like... wishing?" He so wanted to be wrong.

Whaim considered. "Yes, that would work also," she agreed. "The more focused the thought, the better results one gets from the information retrieval."

"It's Aladdin's lamp!" Rodney grinned.

"And I'm the fucking genie," John said glumly.

"We have found many Earth legends have basis in some unknown technology," Radek offered. "SG-1 found that Merlin was a real person, an Ancient, and many of the so-called gods of Earth were simply Goa'uld. That there is a 'magic' lamp as created by an Ancient, even if it is Janus, we should not be surprised."

"If the Tooth Fairy was a.. a Nox, I'm going to be sick," Rodney moaned.

"What is a Tooth Fairy?" Whaim asked, puzzled.

John waved a hand. "Earth legend, too much to explain right now," he said.

"Earth?" Her eyes got big. "Really? You're from Earth?"

They all stopped and looked at her. Then John looked at Rodney.

"Don't look at me like that," he said. "I was busy trying to get you out of that damned thing to talk about where anyone was from."

"How long was I in there?" John asked. "It felt like hours but mostly because it was dark at first."

"You only needed to ask the tidsskrist for anything you would want," Whaim stated.

"Figured that out after a bit," John admitted.

"You were in there for less than an hour," Rodney replied.

"Felt like a lot longer," John replied. He looked at Whaim. "And what's with the... Rules? And the writing on the wall?"

"The writings on the wall are my notes," Whaim replied. "I found multiple references to medical conditions like my mothers and after Janus did not bring me right out of the tidsskrist, I wanted to write down the information so I could find it again."

"Rules? What Rules?" Rodney demanded.

"Those were from Janus, I assumed," Whaim admitted. "They were there when I was inducted into the tidsskrist."

John groaned. That meant this device – as usual for anything associated with Janus – wasn't all it seemed.

"Etched on the wall were three Rules," John explained, even he could hear the capital "R". "No wishing for more wishes. No bringing back anyone who has died. No making someone fall in love."

"You have got to be fucking kidding me!" Rodney exclaimed. But there was a light in his eye that John didn't like.

"Wishes?" Whaim asked. "No. Not wishes... that cannot be right!"

John shrugged. "That's was I read. Wishes."

Rodney's eyes narrowed in calculation. "We can try an experiment," he said.

"Rodney, I think this is best not done in haste," Radek interrupted. "While the traditional number is three, there may be a chance it is only two, or one."

"Or five," Rodney shot back.

"Why not wishes?" John wanted to know.

"Wishes call the genfaerd," Whaim whispered. "Those who take... souls."

"Wraith?" John asked gently.

Whaim nodded once, looking over her shoulder to make sure there were no Wraith behind her.

"Okay, that puts a different spin on everything," Rodney admitted. "We need a lot more research before anything more happens here."

"And what do we do with Whaim?" Radek asked, being practical.

"Infirmary, for now," John directed. He looked at her, "I would like our doctors to make sure you are healthy."

"And for you, Colonel," Radek added. "You were inside the device and need to be checked out."

Damn. He had hoped no one would think of that. "We can go together," he suggested to Whaim.

She nodded shyly.

"Anything we need from here?" Rodney asked.

"Should be safe," John decided. "Lock it up like you normally do and should be fine until we can come back later."

"Tomorrow," Radek pointed out. "Getting late and by the time you're done in the infirmary, it'll be too late to do much. Not a life-threatening problem, so a good night's sleep is in order."

Rodney and Radek closed up the computers they were working on. Rodney put the device in a locked cabinet to be doubly sure that no one would stumble across it – or heaven forbid, touch it – by accident.

They walked out of the lab and down the hall and John suddenly felt dizzy. He stumbled slightly and Rodney turned to look at him. "You okay?"

"Yeah, it's nothing," he reassured him.

Two more strides and then... the pulling feeling again.

"Fuck." John was back in the tidsskrist. Lamp. Whatever. Hopefully it wouldn't take Rodney too long to figure out what had happened.

Whaim had been scared at the thought of wishes. He'd have to think about other terms he could use instead. At least until Rodney and Radek had a chance to sort out what this was and how it worked.

John lay back on the floor – at least it was comfortable – and settled in for a nap.

John didn't know how much time had passed when he was pulled out of the Lamp. He found himself standing in an isolation room in the infirmary, Rodney holding the Lamp.

"You rang?" John drawled.

"It's not fucking funny!" Rodney snapped. "One moment you were walking with us down the hall and then you were gone!"

"I'm assuming there's something of a distance effect from the Lamp?" John asked, settling on the bed that they were standing next to. Carson would be making him sit on it in a minute anyway.

"I, well, freaked a bit before Whaim reminded me of where you were. Probably where," Rodney blushed slightly.

Carson came bustling into the room. "Now what have you gotten yourself into?" he asked genially.

"Rodney turned me into a genie," John stated.

Carson looked between them. "Come again?" he stuttered.

Rodney rolled his eyes. "I didn't do anything. The Colonel here touched an Ancient device that turned out to be an interface to the Ancient database."

"Yeah, one you have to become part of to do anything with it," John shot back.

"You're the one with the uber-ATA gene," Rodney grinned. "That makes you the gene-y."

John rolled his eyes. "Har-de-har-har," he replied. But he couldn't hold in a small grin.

"Now, someone has to explain what's going on here," Carson interrupted.

John sighed. "You do it," he lay back on the bed.

Rodney gave an abbreviated version of the discussion they had earlier.

"You mean that lovely Whaim is an Ancient?" Carson asked.

"Didn't Radek tell you anything?" Rodney demanded.

"I didn't ask and left the young lady to Dr. Dziek," Carson replied. “I wanted to check on the Colonel myself. I was going to catch up with Dr. Dziek later.”

Carson moved to stand next to the bed. “Are you feeling all right?” he asked.

“Pretty much,” John replied. “I was only in a small dark room for what I'm told is less than an hour and nothing happened. So, no reason not to be okay.”

“He’s still tied to the device,” Rodney added. John glared at him briefly but Rodney glared back so John gave up at that point. “If he gets too far from it, he gets sucked back into it.”

Carson looked intrigued at that but worked through a standard checkup. He made notes as he went along, and John winced slightly as the evil penlight-of-doom shone in his eyes.

“Looking fine,” Carson assured him. “I’m going to assume your blood tests will show the same and let you leave since you’ll probably sneak out anyway.” He turned to Rodney. “Can you do a demonstration with your device there? If you think it would be safe. I’d like to watch for any physical stress.”

Rodney glanced at John, who shrugged back. “Been okay so far,” John reluctantly agreed. He did have a small worry if Rodney couldn’t get him out one of these times but the twice he’d been in the Lamp seemed benign.

Rodney looked at the device and considered. “Last time was distance from the device,” he mused. “Let’s try...”

John heard Carson exclaim, “Bloody hell!” before he was pulled back into the thing. At least the lights were still on in the room.

John found himself right back outside the device, still in the infirmary. John stood at the end of the bed he had just by lying on.

“I wouldn’t have believed it!” Carson said. He came over and did a quick scan of John’s vitals. “No changes, that’s good,” he muttered.

“Can we go?” Rodney asked. “I suspect you’re not going to find anything wrong if the stupid thing kept Whaim alive for over ten thousand years.”

“We don’t know what it did to her, yet,” John cautioned.

“She’s alive and young, isn’t she?” Rodney countered. “She's not frail, not like old Elizabeth who aged in spite of being in a stasis pod.”

“True,” John had to agree.

They went off to dinner in the mess, and John knew Rodney was trying hard not to project too much worry. John let the babbling wash over him, a comfortable sound.

Rodney thrust the Lamp in John's hands, "Here, if you hold on to it, you can't get too far from it."

John shrugged. "Makes sense," he admitted.

"Once we get some food, I'll feel better," Rodney confessed. "You made me miss lunch and after this morning..." He cast a sly glance at John, "need to keep my strength up."

John grinned at that memory of the morning. Then frowned. "You haven't eaten all day?"

Rodney held up his hands, "Working. You're the genie, you should know these things."

"Rodney!" John admonished him. "You know better than to skip meals."

Rodney stopped and faced John. "John, breathe," he said seriously. "If I wasn't feeling well, Carson would have caught on. You know he watches both of us like a hawk. And I've been eating well and regularly lately so that missing one meal isn't going to make a huge difference." He placed a hand on John's arm. "Really."

John sighed. "If you say so," he allowed. "But, you're to have a good meal now."

Rodney rolled his eyes, "Yes, mom!" He leaned in for a brief kiss, a bare touching of lips. John could get used to this kissing-in-public thing.

In the mess, Rodney took a tray and, since John was balancing the Lamp, he took food for both of them. John grabbed dessert for each of them at the end, chocolate chip cookies. He automatically took an extra for Rodney.

They settled at their usual table, Rodney passing dishes and utensils over to John. John put the Lamp on the table, eyed the distance and figured he was safe. Leaving the cookies next to Rodney's plate, he then went back for more napkins and drinks, knowing one cup of coffee wasn't going to be enough for Rodney at this point.

Safely back at the table, he settled in and then looked at the food in front of him. Hmm... Not hungry didn't make a lot of sense. Like Rodney, he hadn't eaten all day and should be at least interested in eating.

Rodney looked over and asked, "You going to eat that?" He pointed at John's almost-chicken on the plate. He then really looked at John's untouched plate. "You going to eat anything?"

John looked down at the food. It wasn't unappetizing, or bad, or even terribly unusual. He just wasn't interested in eating. "For some reason, I'm not hungry. At all," he said.

"You okay? Should we go back to Carson?" Rodney started to stand.

John reached out and held him in place. "Relax," he said. "I'm sure there's a reasonable explanation. We just don't know what it might be. You finish eating and we'll go back to see Carson."

"You sure?" Rodney gave him a hard look.

"Yes, Rodney, I'm sure," John said steadily. "You need to eat, I'll just keep you company."

"We'll go back and see Carson right after dinner?" Rodney persisted.

"I suspect your new friend Whaim can give us a clue, too," John offered.

Rodney glared. "Not my friend," he replied.

"Then eat up and we'll figure out what's going on," John said. "This time."

Rodney looked startled for a moment. "Things do seem to happen to us, don't they?" he asked ruefully.

"I got you an extra cookie," John pointed out.

A shy smile this time. "I hoped that was for me," Rodney admitted softly.

"Looks like you can eat mine, too," John said.

Rodney powered through his meal as John sat and watched.

John tried to analyze the feeling he had about the meal in front of him. There was something that prevented him from putting the food into his mouth. It wasn't an awful feeling but it was firm -- which was the only way he could describe it.

"Ready?" Rodney asked, swallowing down the coffee John had brought and wiping his mouth with a napkin.

"Waiting on you," John replied, with a small grin.

"Okay, done," Rodney decided. He wrapped the cookies in a clean napkin, to munch on later, John knew. "I need to wash up," he stated.

"No problem," John agreed.

They went into the bathroom that wasn't too far from the mess and Rodney went in to relieve himself. He looked at John, who had waited by the door as he held the Lamp.

"You don't need to piss?" Rodney asked.

"Guess not," John replied. "Nothing in, nothing out."

"That's one way to look at it, I guess," Rodney replied. He finished up and washed his hands.

"Okay, let's see Carson," Rodney said, heading toward the infirmary.

Carson was out on a break when they got there and before Rodney could rant about it, John suggested, "Let's see Whaim first. We may not need Carson."

"Carson's going to check you out," Rodney said stubbornly.

"Let's see first," John temporized. "Don't want to call him on his break."

They found Whaim in a different isolation room than the one John had been in earlier but the nurse on duty didn't stop them, so John figured it was more for privacy than for any particular reason.

"Hello," John said.

"Oh! Hello!" Whaim beamed at them. "Look, I have a lovely room and the kind nurse has been taking care of me."

"How are you feeling?" Rodney asked. "Because, well... John's not eating."

Her eyes got round at that. "I do not know for sure," she replied. "But I was not at all hungry while I was in the tidsskrist, nor was I thirsty."

"Did you... umm, need to use a bathroom?" Rodney asked delicately.

"Bathroom?" she fumbled over the word for a moment. "Oh, no. No bodily functions while I was in the tidsskrist, either." She tilted her head. "How odd that I did not notice."

"Maybe because you were on your own and not really aware of the time passing," Rodney theorized, "that you did not notice."

She nodded, "That certainly is possible. Scholar Janus would have made provisions if there was a need for food or elimination."

Even John rolled his eyes at that. "Like Janus knew what the fuck he was doing," he murmured. But mostly to himself since it wasn't Whaim's fault that John was stuck in the Lamp at the moment. From Rodney's quick glance, he knew Rodney had heard him.

"Are you hungry now?" Rodney asked.

"Oh, no," she reassured them. "The nurse brought me a meal and I have already eaten. And I have used the facilities, also."

"Okay, then looks like there's no immediate harm in not eating," Rodney decided. "If Whaim could go without a meal for ten thousand years, I guess overnight isn't going to be a big problem."

"We probably should talk to Woolsey before we call it a night," John decided. "While there doesn't seem to be any danger, he should know what's going on."

"Do we have to?" Rodney all but whined.

"It's early yet and, yes, we have to," John said firmly.

"All right, all right," Rodney gave in.

They found Richard Woolsey in his office – he kept open office hours after dinner to allow Atlantis residents a chance to stop in and visit if they wanted.

"I assume you've met our newest resident," John said.

"Whaim? Yes, lovely young lady," Woolsey replied. "Imagine, a real resident of Atlantis and one who doesn't seem to think the city belongs to her."

"Never thought of it that way," Rodney admitted. "John wanted to check in."

"Yes, good of you to do so," Woolsey said. "How are you feeling? I understand Dr. Beckett released you from the infirmary."

"Seems okay," John admitted. "No problems that I can see at the moment. Just wanted to let you know everything's okay and more or less under control."

"Good to hear," Woolsey enthused. "You'll have to keep me apprised of any updates." He eyed the device in John's hand. "Is this the magic Lamp?"

Rodney rolled his eyes. "It's not magic! But, yes, that is the tidsskrist," he said.

John was profoundly grateful that Rodney didn't offer to demonstrate how John disappeared and re-appeared into the device.

"Looks pretty innocuous," Woolsey commented. "But the, we've found that to be true of a number of things."

"Too true," Rodney replied.

"Everything else all set for tonight?" Woolsey asked.

John replied, "Lorne's on call tonight and Matias is his backup. Shouldn't need either of them, everything has been quiet."

"Knock wood," Rodney muttered.

"I know we're in good hands," Woolsey assured them. He looked at Rodney, "Made any wishes yet?" He gave a small grin.

Rodney waved a hand. "No, and I'm not going to do anything soon," he said. "If there are such things as wishes, I'm not going to waste them on trivialities. But I suspect they are more like database searches and I want to make sure I have the right parameters to get the information I'm looking for the first time."

"Good plan," Woolsey replied. "Anything else?"

"Don't think so," John shrugged. "I think we're calling it a night, ourselves. Thanks!"

They wandered through Atlantis, John still carrying the Lamp. The rumor mill evidently had already done its bit, folk eyed the device in John's hands curiously but no one approached them. John wanted to just touch base with the people on duty and show his face around... mostly to show that nothing had changed and he was still here with them. At least turning into a Genie was less problematic than turning into a bug. He hoped.

Rodney was uncharacteristically quiet during the walk-through. John let him be, knowing sometimes Rodney just needed time to process his thoughts. Rodney worked well under pressure but John also knew Rodney sometimes just needed a chance to think and let his genius do its work.

Back in their room, John settled the Lamp on a table near the door of the bedroom. "Should be okay here, I think," he stated.

Rodney nodded and then suddenly reached out for John, bringing him close.

"Fucking Ancients," Rodney muttered into John's shoulder.

John wrapped his arms about Rodney and held him tight. "Hey!" John soothed. "It's not awful, really. There have been way worse things."

"I know, I know," Rodney nodded, which John felt more than saw. "Just... not fair!"

"I'm okay," John said firmly, not letting Rodney go. "Come on, let’s get some sleep. Maybe Radek will have figured it out by the morning." John couldn't resist teasing.

"He better," Rodney murmured.

"Come on," John said. "A shower will do us both good."

Rodney's grip loosened slightly. "You can do that?"

"Guess so," John admitted. "Don't know why not. Don't feel dirty but a shower will do us both good."

"Works for me," Rodney agreed. He leaned in for a kiss.

John tried to put what reassurance he could into the kiss. He knew Rodney was worried about him and needed to reassure his partner that everything would be fine.

"Shower," John reiterated.

"Spoil sport," Rodney grumbled good-naturedly.

"Go ahead and get it started," John directed. "I'll be right behind you."

Rodney went into their bathroom and John grabbed clean boxers and t-shirts for both of them.

"Need to think about laundry soon," John announced as he came into the slightly steamy room.

"What we need is to find you is a replicator that will make an infinite supply of black t-shirts," Rodney grinned. Rodney could never resist the opportunity to tease about John's lack of imagination when it came to underwear. John appreciated Rodney's silk boxers – on Rodney – but didn't really see the appeal himself. He held firmly on his own cotton boxers even if they were good quality cotton, now that they had a reliable supply chain.

The shower was unusually chaste, John's dick didn't even twitch at the view of the expanse of Rodney's pale skin. Although he could try to attribute that on the amazing sex they had the night before. But he was usually at least interested. He chalked that up to the Lamp, too.

Rodney didn't belabor the issue, just raised an eyebrow at John, who shrugged back. John did scrub Rodney's back for him, something he could do without regard to his current condition.

They climbed into bed together and John let Rodney manhandle him into position. Rodney snuggled up to John's back, wrapping an arm around John's waist as if to hold him in place. John placed a kiss on the palm of Rodney's hand and knew Rodney understood when he simply wrapped his fingers about the kiss.

John knew exactly when Rodney fell asleep. He felt the now-familiar pull of the Lamp and he found himself in his underwear on the floor of the interior. Good thing he had put the t-shirt and shorts on before climbing into bed. He resigned himself to waiting. He could watch Rodney sleep, if he wanted but since the room was mostly dark, there wouldn't be much to see. John closed his eyes and focused on his breathing.

It must have been morning, the reverse pull had John standing in their bedroom.

"Thanks for not doing this in public," John commented, waving a hand at his state of dress. Or undress.

"I was worried for a minute," Rodney admitted, "when you weren't in bed when I woke up. Hoped this was where you were."

"Not like I had a chance to leave you a note or anything," John said.

"When did you go back?" Rodney asked.

"When you fell asleep, I think," John told him. "Figured you'd get me out in the morning."

"Did it feel like several hours?" Rodney asked.

John considered. "Yes and no. I knew time was elapsing, but didn't have any idea how much time. It really didn't feel like several hours, if that's a help."

"You should wear your watch, next time," Rodney suggested. "Maybe you can get a better feel for time. Or at least be able to tell how much time is elapsing."

"I'm hoping there aren't too many more next times," John replied. "And I'm not so sure that is a good idea. At this point, it doesn't feel too long while I'm in there. If I know how much time is passing it may be depressing."

"That's a good point," Rodney replied. "Wear it for today so we can see how it goes and then you can take it off at some point later."

"Breakfast?" John asked. He looked down at himself. "Once I get dressed?"

"You hungry?" Rodney asked in surprise.

"No, but you need some food," John replied. "And I can at least be sociable." John grabbed a clean uniform and quickly dressed. He put on the watch he rarely wore around the city.

John knew they had forgotten something as soon as he felt the pull. He found himself standing in their room again.

"We left it behind," Rodney held up the Lamp.

"It's consistent, anyway," John said. He took the Lamp from Rodney. "I'll just have to get used to lugging it around." He juggled the device for a moment. "Is it any heavier when I'm in it?"

"No, now that you ask," Rodney said. "Doesn't seem to make any difference whether you're in it or not."

"Okay, another mystery then," John said. "Breakfast. And since there doesn't seem to be any immediate danger to me or this thing, I should check on the overnight reports."

"So should I," Rodney replied. "Heaven only knows what the minions have been up to. Breakfast first, then we'll take care of business."

Breakfast was waffles. John groaned. "I'm missing waffles," he groused. "This stupid thing better be worth something is all I know."

Rodney took his usual heaping share and John watched as Rodney smothered it all in syrup. John got Rodney an extra cup of coffee when he saw the mug on the table was empty.

John took the Lamp and went off to his office. Lorne was there and grinned at the device. "A Genie? Like Aladdin?"

"Not funny," John shot back but he knew it was a losing battle. Lorne's grin was irrepressible. "Okay, slightly funny. But be careful what you wish for."

"Granted any wishes yet?" Lorne asked.

"Not so far," John replied. "We've been careful about that. I think McKay has something in mind as a test."

"Good luck with that," Lorne said.

"Anything I need to know?" John asked, sitting at his desk and hoping to re-focus the conversation. The overnight report was blessedly quiet. The soldiers they had taken on from Earth – a mixture of Marine and Air Force personnel – were settling in nicely and there were only occasional problems, mostly related to alcohol. There had been an incident with a Gate team soon after the city had returned to Pegasus that had been sobering – no one had died but the injuries brought home that Pegasus was not a place to fuck around with.

Lorne left and John did some of the more urgent paperwork. A couple of the senior NCOs stopped by to give John a hard time but John knew they were checking up on him and put up with the teasing.

"John?" Rodney's voice came on his earpiece.

"Here," John answered.

"Ready when you are," Rodney told him. "The same lab as yesterday. Radek's bringing Whaim."

"Can I wish my paperwork would be done?" John asked rhetorically. "Be right there." He shut down the report he was plodding through and logged off the computer. He stood and stretched in place. "You'd think being a Genie would be good for something," he muttered to himself.

John remembered the Lamp this time, taking it with him to Rodney's lab. He didn't want to make Rodney have to come looking for him if he got accidentally sucked back into the Lamp.

He made it to the lab and found Radek and Whaim already there.

He settled the Lamp on the workbench in the middle of the room. "So, what have you figured out?" he asked.

"Well, the bad news is that the device was the prototype for the Wraith culling device," Radek announced.

John wondered how many more times they could say Fucking Ancients.

"Our buddy Janus must have shared the plans with the wrong people at one point and someone else shared it with the Wraith," Rodney reported. "That's mostly theory but it's too close to the Wraith culling device for it not to be a coincidence."

"But you've been in the Wraith culling device and you're not aware of anything," John said. "Not even of being in the device."

"Well, the Wraith wouldn't want their victims to come out fighting," Radek offered. "They would have figured out how to turn off the consciousness of their victims."

"How horrid!" Whaim exclaimed. "The tidsskrist was meant to be a tool, to study the database, nothing more."

"When it comes to turning the most benign device into something they could use to get a meal," Rodney put in, "the Wraith are excellent at that. They probably couldn't come up with the original design, but bastardizing something would be child's play."

"What next?" John asked.

"You have to wait for a bit," Rodney apologized. "Thought we were almost ready but Radek and I are working on our database search request."

"You're writing a wish!" John grinned.

Rodney shot him a glare that John didn't take personally. He had taken enough from his men already this morning, he was more than willing to share some of that teasing with Rodney.

"We're writing a database search with specific parameters to ensure that we get the optimal result," Rodney replied. Then relented, "Okay, we're writing a wish."

"All right," John said. "Let me know when you're ready."

While Rodney and Radek argued semantics, John went over to visit with Whaim. "Any idea what I should expect?" he asked.

"I have not had a similar experience," she replied. "After Scholar Janus inducted me into the tidsskrist, I worked only on my own and not at the behest of others. Therefore, I have no information to give you."

"What was it like for you?" he asked.

"Some of my memories are growing fainter," she admitted. "It is as if it was a dream. I would like to capture the information I found in the database, if that is at all possible. Scholar Radek thinks what I was looking for is a cure for a disease that still exists and the information I found might be useful to you."

"I'll see if we can capture that," John said. "I wonder if a camera will work in the room."

"Camera?" she asked.

"Digital images ... pictures," John explained.

"Oh! That would be wonderful!" she exclaimed. "If you would not mind attempting that."

"After I see what the Wonder Twins are up to," John said. "We should have a camera handy in the labs, or I know I have one in my room." John winced a bit as his knee twinged slightly.

"What is wrong?" Whaim asked.

"Just a bum knee," he said. "Nothing to worry about. Didn't get my exercise in today."

"You can repair that," she replied. "That is one of the features of the tidsskrist. You can repair minor ailments and some physical attributes of yourself." She put a finger on the end of her nose. "I had physically unattractive nose before I went in. I made it more aesthetically pleasing."

"Really?" John was intrigued. "How does it do that?"

She shrugged. "Something Scholar Janus built into the tidsskrist. His original intention was to search for information on Ascension, and making oneself comfortable with one's own body is an important part of being prepared to Ascend."

"I'll have to try that," John said. He thought about some of the minor ailments he'd like to fix. Getting one new knee alone would be worth the bother – two would be a bonus.

"Okay, I think we're ready," Rodney announced. He looked to Whaim, "Do we have to say this or can he read it? I think it's as precise as its going to get but I don't want to ruin it if inflection changes the meaning."

"I am not sure," she admitted. "I have not attempted a search on behalf of someone else, so I do not know."

"Then the Colonel should read the search for us. If that does not work, then we can try a verbal command," Radek commented.

"Whatever," John said.

"Here," Rodney turned a computer screen to face John.

Find the location of a repository of at least six functional Zero Point Modules/Potentia either on Atlantis and/or on a planet or planets that can be safely traveled to within a week's Jumper travel of a StarGate.

John felt the pull of the Lamp and was on his back on the inside.

This time was different. It was like he was connected to the city and its database in a way he never had before. There always was a connection with anything Ancient but this time it was deeper, more profound. Data flowed through him as he searched.

He became aware again, still in the Lamp. This time he knew how to get himself out.

"Tower 47, floor three. The room is locked and the security password is klatere. There was a cache on P31-477 which is two days from a StarGate but it is unknown if the planet is safe or if the Zero Point Modules are still there," John shook himself.

Rodney came over and put a hand on his back. "You okay?"

"Fuck. That was intense," John admitted. "So much information to sift through. I don't know how Whaim did it for so long." He rubbed a couple of fingers over his forehead, a headache was threatening to bloom.

"You want to see Carson?" Rodney asked.

"No," he said. "I'll be fine. I just need to rest."

"Want to go back to our room?"

"I... okay, sounds silly. But let me go back into the Lamp," John said. "It's pretty benign and Whaim said that it can repair minor physical problems." He shrugged. "I'd like to try it."

"John...." Rodney ground out. A warning.

John held his hands up in surrender. "Just for the headache. If nothing else, I can sleep it off there as well as anywhere else."

"And you won't do anything stupid?" Rodney demanded.

"Nothing stupid," John promised.

Rodney leaned in for a brief kiss. "We have to follow up on your leads, so there's time," he said.

"And you don't go anywhere without me and an escort," John said seriously.

"Not going anywhere," Rodney said. "Tower 47 could be anywhere, we have to figure out which one it is before we can make any plans."

"Ask Whaim," John pointed out. "She lived here."

"Right!" Rodney beamed. "Not used to having our own real, live Ancient to help us."

"Going back now," John said. The pull was less invasive this time, he hoped it was because he had a modicum of control over it. He sat on the floor in the Lamp and decided that maybe a nap would be good. But first, he wanted to know more about fixing knees.... And other things....

John found himself pulled from the Lamp, to find himself in the infirmary.

"What's wrong?" he asked.

"Nothing! Nothing!" Rodney assured him. "I just wanted Carson to check on you," he said.

"Rodney, I'm fine," he said. "I just needed to rest after that search." He bounced in place, "All better now!"

Rodney narrowed his eyes, "You sure?"

He moved closer to Rodney. "Yes, I'm sure," he promised.

Carson came in at that moment, "None of that here!"

"Nothing is that was happening," Rodney rolled his eyes. "Check over John so we can do something where there's some privacy."

John resigned himself to the check-up and Carson kept it low-key. "Looking good," he announced. "If there's anything in the blood tests, I'll let you know."

"Can we go?" John asked pointedly.

"Get out of here!" Carson grinned.

It was after the main dinner time as they went to the mess. Rodney got a couple of sandwiches and some fruit. "No cookies!" he lamented.

"You had your share, and mine, yesterday," John said. "There will be more."

"Did you look at your watch while you were in there this time?" Rodney asked.

"Huh, forgot completely," John admitted. "Fell asleep, I guess. But the headache's better."

"What else did you find?" Rodney asked.

"Umm, not here?" John asked.

Rodney nodded. They both knew there were things that were better not discussed in public; a little knowledge was dangerous and a little gossip went way too far. As much as the SGC vetted anyone sent to Atlantis, they were always conscious that someone could be working for the IOC, the Trust or any one of a dozen foreign countries.

John took the Lamp as they took the long way back to their room. They stopped in Woolsey's office to check in briefly, Rodney had shared the information on the possible ZPM locations earlier while John was resting in the Lamp.

In the room, Rodney said, "So? What?"

"There are two major issues that I can see. Since I was part of the Lamp, I guess I get a little more leeway on searches," John started. "I followed up on Whaim's information on fixing physical problems. It really was directly related to Ascension. If one's body is perfect, one's mind has less to worry about. That sort of crap. It won't fix anything traumatic but it can work on things like my knees. It wasn't clear about your hypoglycemia, I’d have to do a lot more research to figure that out, but it won't touch your citrus allergy. That sort of thing."

"The other issue?" Rodney asked.

"Having access to the entire Ancient database would give someone the access to information on weapons," John said. "You made a benign search for ZPMs, it's just as easy to search for information on some really nasty weapons."

"Oh!" Rodney exclaimed.

"And, of course, there's a down side," John added.

"And the down side?"

"You have to have the ATA gene, as a start," John said. "And you have to become part of the Lamp. You have to be the Genie."

"That's a bummer," Rodney replied.

"And to get out of the fucking Lamp, someone has to take your place," John said.

Silence.

Rodney sighed. "Have I said 'fucking Ancients' or 'fucking Janus' lately?"

"I think so." John gave a small laugh. He brought Rodney close and Rodney wound his arms around John's waist. "I'd like to try to fix my knees. It's fairly benign, and someone needs to test it."

"Oh, so you think some manly cuddling will soften me up for something like that?" Rodney demanded.

"Well, figured it couldn't hurt," John admitted. "And I'll end up back in the lamp when you fall asleep. Might as well be productive."

"I hate when you're right, you know," Rodney groused.

"Sorry." John placed a small kiss on Rodney's temple.

"You have to at least come to bed with me," Rodney said. "I sleep better with you than without you."

"Not a problem," John said. "Always willing to help!"

John found himself back in the Lamp when Rodney fell asleep. John went back to his search for information on fixing his knees and looked the information over several times before he asked the device to do the work. There was a slight feeling of warmth as... something happened. When the warmth faded, he flexed his knees several times. He wouldn't know for sure until he got out of the Lamp if it had worked, but it seemed to be good.

He thought very carefully about his next change. It was more delicate work, something he didn't want to get wrong. He reviewed the database search results carefully and decided it was worth a shot. He gave the command for the device to do the work and another feeling of warmth, almost hot this time. He worried about it for a minute then forced himself to relax.

When it was done, he checked out the work the Lamp had done. He thought it had been worth doing and hoped that Rodney didn't give him too much trouble over it. Rodney would yell at him at first, he knew that, but, in the end, it would be good.

The now-usual pull and John was back out of the Lamp.

"Morning," Rodney said. "How are the knees?"

"Good, I think," John said. "I won't know for sure until I can go running, but they feel better in general, so I think it worked."

"You are going to let Carson check them out before you go running anywhere," Rodney said. "That's the least you can do."

"I can do that," John agreed.

"Then we can talk to Carson about whether it's something he can use to help people out or not," Rodney said. "Despite the limitations, the upside may be worthwhile."

"I don't want this getting out too much," John said. "I can see the IOC wanting to tinker and make super-soldiers or some kind of shit like that. It's meant to be helpful, not a weapon."

"We can trust Carson," Rodney said. "Let's see what he thinks."

The trip to the infirmary came right after breakfast. Rodney wouldn’t let John out of his sight until he was checked over by Carson and John gave in.

"John found a... way to fix his knees," Rodney said once they were in an isolation room where no one could overhear them talking. "I need you to check out his knees and tell me what you think."

"John?" Carson looked at him in mild alarm. "What did you do?"

"Carson!" Rodney said sharply. "Check him out first, then we'll talk about it."

"Tsk, Rodney!" Carson replied. "No offense! I'll check him out."

Carson took x-rays of John's knees and used an ultrasound-type device that had proven useful in checking out joint problems.

Carson shoo'd them back to the isolation room, "I have to look at this first and can't do that with you hovering. I won't be long."

John watched Rodney pace the small room. He finally grabbed Rodney's hand. "Sit, you're making me dizzy."

"What if it goes bad?" Rodney demanded. "What if it's only temporary and then you're... crippled?"

"Rodney, stop," John commanded. "You're thinking too much. Nothing's certain and if I can get a couple of years of really good use, that's more than I would have had. Breathe."

Rodney took a breath and held it for a moment before exhaling. "I just... worry," he admitted.

"I know," John soothed. "You're allowed, actually." He gave a small smile and admitted, "It's nice to be worried about, actually."

"You idiot," Rodney said.

Rodney settled on the bed next to John, the warmth of his body was comforting.

It was almost an hour before Carson came in. "Congratulations, Colonel, you have two perfect knees!"

"Really?" John asked.

Carson went over to the computer in the room and brought up some images. "This is the last image I had of your knees and this is an image we took today. You can see that the cartilage damage here is gone, the beginning of arthritis has been removed and the slight meniscus tear is gone. I don't know what you did, and I'm not quite sure I want to know, but you're as good as new."

"We're concerned that if the wrong people get hold of this, then it might be used as a weapon, instead of what it was meant to do," John said. "It's the Lamp, of course. I'm worried that in the wrong hands, that someone may try to build a super-soldier or something worse." John didn't even want to talk about searching for weapons aloud.

Carson considered. "Is there any way to use the Lamp to restrict itself?"

Rodney snapped his fingers in a way that John knew he had a brainstorm. "I still have two wishes. I can use them to see about putting limitations on the Lamp."

"That'll be better," John admitted. "And I can do some searching from within the Lamp."

John felt better now that they had something that resembled a plan. It wasn't fool-proof but it should slow anyone else down.

They hadn’t planned on Whaim.

"But, I do not understand," she said when they explained what they were going to do. "You have to be a part of the tidsskrist to make it work. And since there is only one tidsskrist, it would not be simple for any number of people to use."

"We have a working Lamp," Rodney said gently. "It's simple to make another. We can copy this and make hundreds of copies."

"But, you can control who can use the tidsskrist!" she protested. "You have to!"

"We would like to," John replied. "But we work for others and sometimes we don't have control over who gets this information. By controlling the Lamp now, we try to do the best for our people."

Her eyes narrowed. "We must make it so that you cannot make a copy," she said firmly.

"Our thoughts exactly," Rodney grinned. "At this point, you're the expert. We need your help."

She looked at John, "You can do a search from within the tidsskrist. Scholar Janus may have left information to help us."

"I'm not going to count on that," Rodney said. "But it can't hurt."

"Okay," John agreed. "I'll see what I can find out."

There was a party that night, celebrating the cache of ZPMs they had 'found.' Whaim had identified the proper tower for them and John had delegated the task to Lorne to open the room. It had been relatively straightforward task and it turned out there were two pods of eight ZPMs in the room.

"Sixteen ZedPMs!" Rodney enthused. "What we can do with that!"

"They have to be tested first," Radek broke in practically. But John could see the gears whirling in his head. Just like every other scientist on the city. "But even if we only get to keep six, we will be much better off than we could have hoped."

That was the downside to finding a cache of ZPMs, many of them would need to go back to Earth. Powering the chair in Antarctica, and putting units on the Daedalus and the Phoenix were critical to both Earth and Pegasus. Getting ZPMs to put into the Earth power grid would also help with the current variation of the ongoing energy crisis.

Rodney sighed, then brightened. "Well, P31-477 is looking good in the Ancient database, we can hope for more there."

"I'm not so sure about looking good," John said. "There's not much in the database and even I couldn't find out a lot."

"Spoilsport," Rodney teased. "Enjoy the party!"

John tried to think of himself as the designated driver for the moment. Since he couldn't eat or drink, he couldn't partake of the party food. Or the alcohol that came both from Earth and Radek's still.

In the Lamp that night, John searched for ways to disable the Lamp or at least to be able to get out without having to trap someone else inside.

The usual pull had John out in their room.

"Wait a minute," John said. "Before I forget completely, let me grab my camera and see if I can take pictures of the inside. Whaim asked me to do that and I haven't had a chance."

"Sure," Rodney agreed.

Back inside the Lamp, John took overlapping picture of the writing on the walls of the Lamp. He didn't want to miss anything.

Rodney brought him back out and John handed him the camera. "You should be able to do something with this," he said.

"Thanks!" Rodney skimmed through the pictures. "I wasn't sure you'd be able to bring anything out," he commented. "And this will take time to translate."

"Rodney," John said patiently. "Whaim is an Ancient. It's her language. She can translate for you."

Rodney looked up. "Why do I keep forgetting that?" he asked.

"You're over worked," John said. "And, well, I suspect you’re a tad distracted."

"I guess," Rodney allowed with a rueful grin.

"Okay, I did some searching last night while you were sleeping to see about either locking the Lamp or disabling it," John went on.

"I really hate to totally disable it," Rodney replied. "But I'd rather do that than let it fall into the wrong hands."

"I think we can lock it down," John said. "It will take one of your wishes, but we can limit access to the Lamp to a teeny list of trusted folk. If someone's not on the list, it won't work for them."

"That's reasonable," Rodney allowed. "What about getting you out of the Lamp?"

"I've had no luck with that," John admitted. "As far as I can tell, the default setting is for someone to be in the Lamp."

"Janus lied to Whaim," Rodney said flatly.

"Clearly," John said. "He had no intention to get her out of the Lamp."

"That bastard!" Rodney exclaimed.

"Nothing we can do right now," John said. "Breakfast."

"Okay, okay," Rodney said.

After the meal, then went back to the lab. Rodney downloaded John's pictures to the database and put in a request for a translation. "Let's see what the linguists can do with it," Rodney explained. "Whaim can correct it for them and everyone learns something."

They worked through the day, not really finding anything more. They met up with Whaim and Radek before dinner.

"We're pretty sure we can lock it down," Rodney said. "We can essentially put in a list of names of folk we trust and include a clause that any person on the list can amend the list. That way we won't be stuck if something happens to us. I'm proposing, us, Sam Carter, Daniel Jackson, Jack O'Neill and Teal'c, my sister, Carson, and Parrish. Anyone else?"

"How about Mitchell and Vala?" John offered. "They can back up SG-1 if it's needed and gives us a couple more folk who are Earth-side."

Radek put in, "We should have a couple more civilians. Or at least one more. I have no problem with your choices but a couple more civilians would be better."

John considered, "How about Norah Bending? No one would think of her and she comes with some good recommendations."

Radek nodded. "That is good," he agreed. "I have heard that she wants to stay here and not rotate back to Earth. She has no family and would be someone outside this group that I think we can trust."

"Now, about getting John out of the Lamp," Rodney said.

"You should be able to just remove him with the information Scholar Janus left," Whaim asked.

Rodney looked at her sadly. "Sorry, child, but he had no intention of letting you out. John's done the research more than once and there's no 'exit' command. Someone has to be in the Lamp."

"But if you turn it off?" she asked, eyes wide.

"Then whomever is in the Lamp will die," he said gently.

"No! Scholar Janus would not..." she tried to protest.

Radek put an arm around her. "Your Scholar Janus is not known as a good person by us. He has left many dangerous experiments with no information on how to finish them up or fix them. We have lost too many people to some of the work he left behind."

"Then let me go back into the tidsskrist," she offered. "I can help you from there, as well as help 'lock down' access to the database so only those deemed worthy can use it."

"But, you just got out!" John protested.

She looked at him sadly. "I do enjoy being out of the Lamp," she acknowledged. "But... all my friends and family are long gone. I can be of more service to you and to the city in the tidsskrist than outside of it."

"You do not have to do this," Rodney said.

"Yes, you should take some time to think about it," Radek said. "The Colonel will be fine for another day or two while you consider your decision."

"I... thank you," she replied gravely. "I do not think I will reconsider but your kindness is greatly appreciated."

"If you find a way to get out without trapping someone else," Rodney said, "we'll be glad to help with that."

"That is reasonable," she agreed.

"And we will come to talk with you regularly, even if we do not use wishes," Radek promised. "There are many things you can help us with."

"I look forward to that!" Whaim said brightly.

"Anything else we need to do right now?" Rodney asked. "Radek and I will work on the list of names and the locking procedure. We can do that tomorrow. Then, if she is still agreeable, we can see about John and Whaim trading places the next day. Sound like a plan?"

Everyone nodded.

"What do we tell Mr. Woolsey?" John asked.

"Not that we're going to tell anyone about the list, but I'm not putting his name on the list so he can't be 'requested' to use the Lamp by the IOC," Rodney said. "But I do think we should tell him so that he's aware."

"He can explain it to the IOC as a 'malfunction'," Radek suggested. "We got the ZPMs from it and then it stopped working. We will continue to work on it, of course, but we have no idea how it works or if we can get it to work again. There's no incentive to copying something that's broken."

"That sounds reasonable," John agreed. He liked Woolsey, for getting the city back to Pegasus where it belonged, if nothing else. He was one of the good guys and as reasonable of a boss as John had had in a long time.

"Tomorrow, then?" Rodney said to the group.

They went and talked to Woolsey, who was happy with the solution John and Rodney presented to him.

"It's hard," he admitted. "Too many things can be turned into weapons and even if it involves a person, there are members of the IOC who would not stop to think about what that means. 'No longer functional but working on it' is an elegant solution."

"Good!" Rodney smiled.

The locking went reasonably well the next day. John felt something in his head resembling a click as Rodney went through the list of names and the restrictions they were putting on the system.

"That did it," John said when they were done. "I can't tell you quite how I know that, but it's as secure as we can make it."

"Good!" Rodney replied.

The following day found John, Rodney, Radek and Whaim in the lab.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" Rodney asked again. "We'll continue to look for other options."

"I am sure," Whaim assured him. "Thank you for rescuing me in the first place. And do come by to visit whenever you would like."

"If you're ready?" Rodney asked.

John looked her in the eyes. "Thank you," he said seriously.

Whaim nodded.

Rodney said, deliberately, "I wish that Whaim would take John's place in the tidsskrist."

John felt a momentary beginning of a pull but it didn't pull him into the lamp. There was a snap of sorts, John thought of it as the connection between him and the Lamp breaking.

Whaim disappeared. The three men were left standing in the lab.

"Radek, would you put the Lamp away for us?" Rodney asked. "I don't want to touch it at the moment, I don't know what level of ATA gene it will take to become the... genie. Just don't want to risk it just yet."

"Certainly," Radek assured him. "I'll take care of it."

"Thank you," Rodney said. "Let's come back tomorrow and get Whaim out, as a test. I want to make sure we can get her out like we promised." Radek nodded.

He looked at John. "Dinner?"

John considered. "Yup, hungry now."

Rodney beamed.

That night, John let Rodney shower ahead of him. Rodney was naked on the bed when John came out his own shower, wearing only a towel.

"I, umm, got you something," John admitted, hesitantly.

"John...." Rodney's eyes narrowed.

"No, promise, it's good," John hastened to reassure him. "Well, I haven't had a chance to try it out yet. Was hoping you'd help me with that."

"What did you do?" Rodney demanded.

"Well, this..." John took off the towel.

"John!" John wasn't sure if Rodney was mad at him or not.

"I, umm, well, I like you, when you... you're in me and I wanted to, I guess, return the favor and... I know you've never complained but, well, I just wanted to."

Good thing Rodney was a genius. "Come here, you idiot," he said softly. "I was never unhappy with your dick, you know."

John felt himself blush. "I know but, well... Mphf..." Rodney pulled him down and mercifully stopped the embarrassing explanation by kissing him.

"Well, what's done is done," Rodney said pragmatically. Then gave a wicked grin. "And I guess I'll have to let you try it out. As a scientific experiment, of course."

John relaxed with that. Not all of him. His new dick wasn't overly large, he hadn't wanted to be a freak about it, after all. Or for Carson to give him the evil eye the next time he went in for a physical. It was just slightly longer and slightly bigger around. It had made for a nice handful just now in the shower. But he hadn't wanted to come in the shower, he wanted to wait for Rodney. And his dick certainly was interested in Rodney's experiment.

"Stop thinking," Rodney murmured in his ear. "Let's try this baby out."

John prepared Rodney more carefully than he normally did. He didn't want to hurt Rodney with his new size.

"Come on!" Rodney urged. "Get this party started!"

John leaned in and kissed Rodney firmly as he twisted three fingers inside Rodney. He knew he'd caught Rodney's prostate when Rodney moaned into the kiss. Sitting up slightly, John used the lube on his fingers on himself and then positioned himself at Rodney's hole.

"John!" Rodney breathed as John breached him. John paused as Rodney adjusted but continued when Rodney rolled his hips slightly.

"Oh my God!" Rodney sighed. "Okay, you win. This is awesome... it's so much better than I would have thought."

John grinned at him. Then moved with intent. It wasn't too long before he found Rodney's prostate again, tagging it more often than not. Rodney's orgasm hit suddenly and the pressure on John's cock had John coming with the next thrust.

After they caught their breath, John got up and got a washcloth to clean them both up. He dropped it over the side of the bed and let Rodney cuddle behind him.

"Okay, you can keep that," Rodney allowed.